Families across the country are adapting to the
evolving changes in daily life caused by the COVID-19 pandemic. Most schools,
places of public gathering, and nonessential businesses are closed, and parents
and other caregivers are faced with helping their families adjust to the new
normal. This includes trying to keep children occupied, feeling safe, and
attempting to keep up with schoolwork as best as possible. None of this easy,
but it helps to stay focused on what is possible in order to reinforce a sense
of control and to reassure children that they are okay, and that the situation
will get better.
As we work to maintain our students’ academic progress
and provide quality instruction through our digital platforms, we are also
focused on the emotional health of our students and families.
It is very important to remember that children look to
adults for guidance on how to react to stressful events. Acknowledging some
level of concern, without panicking, is appropriate and can result in taking
the necessary actions that reduce the risk of illness. Teaching children
positive preventive measures, talking with them about their fears, and giving
them a sense of some control over their risk of infection can help reduce
anxiety. This is also a tremendous opportunity for adults to model for children
problem-solving, flexibility, and compassion as we all work through adjust meeting
daily schedules, balancing work and other activities, getting creative about
how we spend time, processing new information from authorities, and connecting
and supporting friends and family members in new ways. The following tips can
help.
Please visit http://tiny.cc/PsychologicalServices
for additional resources to support emotional health during these unprecedented
times.
Tips
for Families
STAY CALM, LISTEN, AND OFFER REASSURANCE
- Be
a role model. Children will react to and
follow your reactions. They learn from your example.
- Be
aware of how you talk about COVID-19. Your
discussion about COVID-19 can increase or decrease your child's fear. If
true, remind your child that your family is healthy, and you are going to
do everything within your power to keep loved ones safe and well.
Carefully listen or have them draw or write out their thoughts and
feelings and respond with truth and reassurance.
- Explain
social distancing. Children probably don’t
fully understand why parents/guardians aren’t allowing them to be with
friends. Tell your child that your family is following the guidelines of
the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), which include social
distancing. Social distancing means staying away from others until the
risk of contracting COVID-19 is under control. Showing older children the
"flatten the curve" charts will help them grasp the significance
of social distancing. Explain that while we don't know how long it will
take to "flatten the curve" to reduce the number of those
infected, we do know that this is a critical time—we must follow the
guidelines of health experts to do our part.
- Demonstrate
deep breathing. Deep breathing is a valuable
tool for calming the nervous system. Do breathing exercises with your
children.
- Focus
on the positive. Celebrate having more time to
spend as a family. Make it as fun as possible. Do family projects.
Organize belongings, create masterpieces. Sing, laugh, and go outside, if
possible, to connect with nature and get needed exercise. Allow older
children to connect with their friends virtually.
- Establish
and maintain a daily routine. Keeping a
regular schedule provides a sense of control, predictability, calm, and
well-being. It also helps children and other family members respect
others’ need for quiet or uninterrupted time and when they can connect
with friends virtually.
- Identify
projects that might help others. This could
include: writing letters to the neighbors or others who might be stuck at
home alone or to healthcare workers; sending positive messages over social
media; or reading a favorite children’s book on a social media platform
for younger children to hear.
- Offer lots of love and affection.
MONITOR TELEVISION VIEWING AND SOCIAL
MEDIA
- Parents/guardians
should monitor television, internet, and social media viewing—both for
themselves and their children. Watching continual updates on COVID-19 may
increase fear and anxiety. Developmentally inappropriate information, or
information designed for adults, can also cause anxiety or confusion,
particularly in young children.
- Dispel
rumors and inaccurate information. Explain to your child that many stories
about COVID-19 on the internet may include rumors and inaccurate information.
Older children, in particular, may be accessing a great deal of
information online and from friends that contains inaccuracies. Talk to
your child about factual disease information.
- Provide
alternatives. Engage your child in games or other exciting activities
instead.
TAKE TIME TO TALK
- Let
your children's questions guide you. Answer
their questions truthfully, but don't offer unnecessary details or facts.
Don't avoid giving them the information that experts indicate as crucial
to your children's well-being. Often, children and youth do not talk about
their concerns because they are confused or don't want to worry loved
ones. Younger children absorb scary information in waves. They ask
questions, listen, play, and then repeat the cycle. Children always feel
empowered if they can control some aspects of their life. A sense of
control reduces fear.
BE HONEST AND ACCURATE
- Correct
misinformation. Children often imagine
situations worse than reality; therefore, offering developmentally
appropriate facts can reduce fears.
- Explain
simple safety steps. Tell your child this
disease spreads between people who are in close contact with one another,
when an infected person coughs or sneezes, or when one touches infected
objects or surfaces.
- Stay
up-to-date on the facts. Go to https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/index.htmlfor
additional factual information.
KEEP EXPLANATIONS AGE-APPROPRIATE
- Early
elementary school children. Provide brief,
simple information that balances COVID-19 facts with appropriate
reassurances that adults are there to help keep them healthy and to take
care of them if they do get sick. Give simple examples of the steps people
make every day to stop germs and stay healthy, such as washing hands. Use
language such as "adults are working hard to keep you safe."
- Upper
elementary and early middle school children. This
age group often is more vocal in asking questions about whether they
indeed are safe and what will happen if COVID-19 spreads in their area.
They may need assistance separating reality from rumor and fantasy.
Discuss the efforts national, state, and community leaders are doing to
prevent germs from spreading.
- Upper
middle and high school students. Issues can be
discussed in more depth. Refer them to appropriate sources of COVID-19
facts. Provide honest, accurate, and factual information about the current
status of COVID-19. Engage them in decision-making about family
plans, scheduling, and helping with chores at home.
- For
all children, encourage them to verbalize their thoughts and feelings. Be
a good listener!
STAY CONNECTED TO SCHOOL
- Locate learning resources. Schools’ capacity to
conduct virtual learning experiences will vary greatly, but most schools
are providing lessons and learning activities for children to do. Take
advantage of the many companies and online platforms currently offering
free learning opportunities.
- Identify additional resources. Know if your
school or district is providing additional resources, such meals, or
technology, such as a laptop or tablet.
- Stay in touch. Find out how the school is
communicating with families and students. Be sure to read any
communications you receive. Check with you children, particularly older
ones, as they may be receiving information directly that would be helpful
for you to know.
- Connect with school staff. Reach out to your
child’s teacher and other relevant school staff if you have concerns about
their coping and keeping up with assignments or activities.
KNOW THE SYMPTOMS OF COVID-19
- According
to the CDC, symptoms of fever, cough, and/or shortness of breath appear
within 14 days after being exposed to the disease.
- For
some people, the symptoms are similar to having a cold; for others, they
are more severe or even life threatening.
MODEL BASIC HYGIENE AND HEALTHY LIFESTYLE
PRACTICES
- Practice
daily good hygiene. Encourage your child to
practice these simple steps to prevent spreading the virus.
- Wash
your hands multiple times a day for 20 seconds. Signing “Twinkle, Twinkle
Little Star” or “Happy Birthday” twice is about 20 seconds.
- Compliment
your children when they use a Kleenex or sneeze or cough into the bend of
their elbow. Teach them the importance of throwing away used tissues
immediately after sneezing or coughing.
- Sadly,
handshakes and hugs need to be limited to immediate family members, at
least for now.
- Foster
a sense of control. Offering guidance on what
your child/children can do to prevent infection offers them a greater
sense of control, which reduces anxiety.
- Build
the immune system. Encourage your child to
eat a balanced diet, get enough sleep, and exercise regularly; this will
help them develop a robust immune system to fight off illness.
BE AWARE OF YOUR CHILDREN’S MENTAL HEALTH
Most children will manage well with the support of
parents and other family members, even if showing signs of some anxiety or
concerns, such as difficulty sleeping or concentrating. Some children, however,
may have risk factors for more intense reactions, including severe anxiety,
depression, and suicidal behaviors. Risk factors can include a pre-existing
mental health problem, prior traumatic experiences or abuse, family
instability, or the loss of a loved one. Parents and caregivers should contact
a professional if children exhibit significant changes in behavior or any of
the following symptoms for more than 2 weeks.
Preschoolers—thumb
sucking, bedwetting, clinging to parents, sleep disturbances, loss of appetite,
fear of the dark, regression in behavior, and withdrawal.
Elementary school children—irritability,
aggressiveness, clinginess, nightmares, school avoidance, poor concentration,
and withdrawal from activities and friends.
Adolescents—sleeping
and eating disturbances, agitation, increase in conflicts, physical complaints,
delinquent behavior, and poor concentration.
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES
For more information related to schools
and physical and mental health, visit www.nasponline.org and www.nasn.org.
Adapted from, Talking to Children About COVID-19
(Coronavirus): A Parent Resource, National Association of School Psychologists
and National Association of School Nurses, NASP, 2020.
Contributor: School Psychologist Kathy Sievering
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